Hi Emily,

Over the last few months I've started to really fall for one of my colleagues. One thing led to another, and I ended up sleeping with him. The whole situation has sadly turned into a friends with benefits situation. The thing is, I always end up staying the night and we talk and cuddle. He's never pushed for a relationship, although I, for one, would love more. I  just can't understand why he's so affectionate if he just wants sex from me. I'm so ashamed of myself for even getting into a situation like this in the first place. I have a gut feeling he's not interested in more, and I don't know how to end it. I've fallen pretty hard.

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------------

Hard as it is to understand, there are people who can have sex, show affection, and want nothing more from a relationship -- millions of them, actually! You don't have to be ashamed that you got into this situation. You didn't know how this was going to turn out -- but now you do. I'm not sure what you mean when you say "I don't know how to end it" because it seems pretty clear to me. You are a sophisticated, intelligent adult woman who is in touch with her feelings. The next time you see him, you simply say, "I had a revelation about what's going on with us, and I no longer want the friends with benefits relationship with you. I have feelings that go beyond that, and it's right to stop it now." Let him be the one to argue against it if he doesn't want to lose you.