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He Cheated On Ex
- By Miss Emily
- Published 07/23/2010
- Relationships - Women
Dear Miss Emily:
I have been sating this guy for 5 months. Early on he told me his last relationship had ended because he had cheated. He says to this day he knows he did a terrible thing and feels very remorseful about it. I've always believed what someone did before they meet me didn't matter but I'm having a hard time with this. He was engaged to this woman and cheated on her not once but many times with the same woman over the course of a 2 year span. Am I over reacting? He hasn't done anything to make me think he won't be faithful to me. I have mentioned to him that this bothers me and he said he doesn't know what to say or do to make more feel better about it and know that it won't happen again. Am I crazy and should just let it go? Any advice?
---------------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------
This relationship won't work unless you can let go`and not dwell on something you cannot change. I think his honesty concerning this issue is a good sign, and he obviously wasn't ready for a commitment of marriage. You can't constantly worry that he'll do the same to you! (Of course, you could -- but that would ruin the relationship). Give him the benefit of the doubt at this point in time. I always suggest to my readers, when this problem comes up, say this: "If ever you feel this relationship isn't working and you want to see someone else, just let me be the first to know. I make a promise to you that I won't go ballistic, because the truth is more important to me than being played for a fool." Now, go have a good time in this relationship. There are few guarantees in life other than death and taxes.
I have been sating this guy for 5 months. Early on he told me his last relationship had ended because he had cheated. He says to this day he knows he did a terrible thing and feels very remorseful about it. I've always believed what someone did before they meet me didn't matter but I'm having a hard time with this. He was engaged to this woman and cheated on her not once but many times with the same woman over the course of a 2 year span. Am I over reacting? He hasn't done anything to make me think he won't be faithful to me. I have mentioned to him that this bothers me and he said he doesn't know what to say or do to make more feel better about it and know that it won't happen again. Am I crazy and should just let it go? Any advice?
---------------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------
This relationship won't work unless you can let go`and not dwell on something you cannot change. I think his honesty concerning this issue is a good sign, and he obviously wasn't ready for a commitment of marriage. You can't constantly worry that he'll do the same to you! (Of course, you could -- but that would ruin the relationship). Give him the benefit of the doubt at this point in time. I always suggest to my readers, when this problem comes up, say this: "If ever you feel this relationship isn't working and you want to see someone else, just let me be the first to know. I make a promise to you that I won't go ballistic, because the truth is more important to me than being played for a fool." Now, go have a good time in this relationship. There are few guarantees in life other than death and taxes.

