Dear Miss Emily:

Exactly 2months ago i started a long distance relationship with someone. I am a little confused as i am not certain this will work, but i know he has feelings for me. Let me just point out we used to attend high school together, and his family knows mine. The main thing is he will be coming to see me in August, and i have a lot of hang ups. I am some sort of a social butterfly, and he's not the normal person i would date -- plus i don't find him physically attractive. What if when he comes i become totally turned off?  He is a christian, i am a worldian, i love sex, he doesn't want sex before marriage. You see where the difficulties lie. However, he makes me soo happy, just hearing his voice makes me want to sing --  at times i do :)  I know i sound confused, yes i am, but i hope i am making sense. I am also afraid i will be ridiculed behind my back from my social associates, as he doesnt fit the stereotypical image of what a social butterfly's boyfriend should be. PLEASE HELP!

--------------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------------

If this guy makes you sing (and I wish I could remember the last time that happened in my little world), who cares what anyone else may think? That seems a tad shallow, in my humble opinion. He may not be the typical guy you date, nor socially meets a standard, but you have a friendship and, although he likes you, you can set the terms of the relationship. If you make it clear to the people with whom you socialize that his family is friends with your family, and he's visiting on vacation, I see no reason to panic. I think you're worrying, needlessly. The fact that he doesn't want sex before marriage lets you off the hook. If he does move in for a kiss, and you aren't interested, tell him! I think he'll be able to go on with his life without considering suicide. But what may be gained by seeing him, in August, is a lasting friendship you will cherish for many years to come.