Dear Miss Emily:

I have really nobody to talk to cause its all embarrassing. So my boyfriend he has sorta decided that he wants to get me a ring and ask me to marry him, and I'm not sure what i am suppose to do because i love him  -- but there's a problem-- he gets all angry when i hang out with my other guy friends and he doesn't trust me at all. But he so kind, and he gets me but i need to know if he's basically trying to control my life. Does that mean he doesn't really love me?

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-------------------------

I think there's an attempt to control your environment, and that's unfortunate because it's going to ruin your relationship with him. But, yes, in his way, he loves you. Trust has to be the cornerstone of any good, lasting relationship and he has to know he can trust you and vice-versa. If he's included when you see these friends, or at least you ask him along, he has no cause to be concerned. However, you should give him top priority without feeling as if you're giving something up, or feel stripped of your freedom to be who you are. I tend to think you two aren't ready for marriage -- and it would be silly to entertain the idea unless you truly are. Know what you're getting into before you take that leap. It's a big one and can backfire if you aren't prepared for what's ahead. I think marriage used to have greater meaning in days now gone. Many people, today, look at marriage as something they may revisit more than once -- nor truly understand the ramifications if it doesn't work out -- thinking it's easy to get a divorce and start again. But if you have kids, that's when divorce gets dicey. I always liked the idea of finding the right person and creating a new life and family with that person -- with trust, commitment and absolute respect as its foundation -- and have it be "forever." Ah, we can dream, can't we? Bottom line: Ask yourself these questions: What about children? Would I be ready if it happened? Do I plan on waiting to have them? Are we both financially secure? Do we have a plan that will make our lives together a success, or are we just going to hope things work out? These are all areas to consider before you take that ring from a sweet guy who may get you, but also gets jealous, has trust issues, and wants to call the shots in ways you object.  Work all this out, or I  think you'll regret being hasty.