So recently I started a awkward
"friends with benefits/Pseudo-Dating" situation with an ex. We talk,
cuddle, have sex and spend time together whenever we can (Around VERY
hectic work schedules) but we don't have an exclusive relationship with
titles (BF/GF) and I've realized I still have feelings for her. I'm
horribly confused in this situation and after talking with her
friends...So is she. I want to have an exclusive relationship but when I
asked recently if she wanted to take that step she says she needs time
to think about it. Our relationship originally ended with us taking a
break and me dating her friend (Out of spite honestly...Not my
proudest moment) so I understand that she's guarding her feelings but I
don't know how to show her how I feel. I plan on cooking her dinner
next time we meet and showing her how I feel next time we meet but Is
that too much right now? I REALLY want to fix this and try again.
I see no reason to push
it. I understand that the FWB
relationship is often misguided. Operating under its umbrella
is, for some, nothing more than an agreement to forgo any commitment --
even if the two people care a great deal for each other. But, because of
your past with her, I'd take the urgency out of it and let it flow into
something more meaningful. If you push this, it can backfire because
time is what you need to get it right. Now there's no assurance that
this will do the trick, but patience is a virtue in this case. A nice
dinner prepared by you shows your talents, if you are a good cook. But make it casual, don't trip
over your feet trying to put a cloth napkin in her lap -- and avoid
candlelight on this one. Right now -- keep it casual, fun and relaxed. If, in a reasonable
amount of time, she still doesn't want to get more involved -- it might
be wise to ditch the FWB relationship, because it will only break your
heart.