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Is Teen Ex Flake or Fickle?
- By Miss Emily
- Published 06/9/2010
- Relationships - Teens
Dear Miss Emily:
I really need some advice..a few weeks ago my boyfriend of nearly 2 years broke up with me. before this we decided to take a break because of the leaving cert which was coming up (very important exams which pretty much determine your life and whether you get into college or not!)..he told me he loved me and that it was just a break..a few days later he found out from one of his friends that this guy i used to like when i was like 12 had told me he liked me so he broke up with me told me he only said he loved me the night we went on a break cause its what i wanted to hear and now thinks i cheated. anyone who knows me knows I'm just not the kind of person to ever do that but his ex cheated on him 3 times so hes very paranoid about it and he kept saying i was saying the same things she did when she cheated :(...Ive tried to talk to him so many times but he wont reply or answer and doesn't want to talk to me. i just annoy him the more i keep trying. I heard yesterday from his friend that hes moved on and started gout with this girl who "seems really nice" and he said hes happy. i don't know if he really is or it's just a way for himself to feel he got back at me because he thinks i cheated? I'm so upset and confused and my leaving cert starts tomorrow so i really need to focus but i still love him so much and and it hurts that he wont talk to me at all and that hes with someone so soon especially because i didn't do anything wrong and feel its not fair on me..but i don't know how to get him to see this? or even how to get him to talk or see me ever again even in 2 weeks when the exams are over..
----------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
I'm the suspicious type, sometimes, and I'm wondering, just wondering, if he is using this as an excuse to cut ties -- blame you as a convenient way to get what he wants -- dating other girls. Any possibility I could be on the right track? If not, his paranoia, and shortsightedness does not speak well of him. He takes some comment about an old boyfriend still liking you, and he twists that into him being victimized. Poor darling! You tried everything to explain your side (you've been together two years), and if he doesn't trust you just because someone mentioned to him an ex likes you (and so what?), he's got to get over himself, his past, and stop blaming others for the decisions he makes. He's young, I get it, and teens can be strange beasts. But you did nothing wrong, and I would start focusing on my life, my future (ace those exams), and wait and see if he comes to you, on bended knee, asking for your forgiveness -- or I'd consider the source. You would now be able to see him for who he really is, and that's not a stand-up guy.
I really need some advice..a few weeks ago my boyfriend of nearly 2 years broke up with me. before this we decided to take a break because of the leaving cert which was coming up (very important exams which pretty much determine your life and whether you get into college or not!)..he told me he loved me and that it was just a break..a few days later he found out from one of his friends that this guy i used to like when i was like 12 had told me he liked me so he broke up with me told me he only said he loved me the night we went on a break cause its what i wanted to hear and now thinks i cheated. anyone who knows me knows I'm just not the kind of person to ever do that but his ex cheated on him 3 times so hes very paranoid about it and he kept saying i was saying the same things she did when she cheated :(...Ive tried to talk to him so many times but he wont reply or answer and doesn't want to talk to me. i just annoy him the more i keep trying. I heard yesterday from his friend that hes moved on and started gout with this girl who "seems really nice" and he said hes happy. i don't know if he really is or it's just a way for himself to feel he got back at me because he thinks i cheated? I'm so upset and confused and my leaving cert starts tomorrow so i really need to focus but i still love him so much and and it hurts that he wont talk to me at all and that hes with someone so soon especially because i didn't do anything wrong and feel its not fair on me..but i don't know how to get him to see this? or even how to get him to talk or see me ever again even in 2 weeks when the exams are over..
----------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
I'm the suspicious type, sometimes, and I'm wondering, just wondering, if he is using this as an excuse to cut ties -- blame you as a convenient way to get what he wants -- dating other girls. Any possibility I could be on the right track? If not, his paranoia, and shortsightedness does not speak well of him. He takes some comment about an old boyfriend still liking you, and he twists that into him being victimized. Poor darling! You tried everything to explain your side (you've been together two years), and if he doesn't trust you just because someone mentioned to him an ex likes you (and so what?), he's got to get over himself, his past, and stop blaming others for the decisions he makes. He's young, I get it, and teens can be strange beasts. But you did nothing wrong, and I would start focusing on my life, my future (ace those exams), and wait and see if he comes to you, on bended knee, asking for your forgiveness -- or I'd consider the source. You would now be able to see him for who he really is, and that's not a stand-up guy.
