Dear Miss Emily:

I have been in a relationship with my partner for two years. When we first met he told me he had been in a previous relationship but she moved away. I found out this was a lie an they were never together. Why did he lie? A few months later she got in contact with him he replied, but didn't mention he was in a relationship with me but said he was too busy to meet her. This may sound stupid, but am  I being insecure? She then added him on facebook -- he lied an said he didn't know who she was (I didn't know her name just her nickname). After 6 months he told me proudly it was this girl. Why lie an then come clean? Could he still have feelings for her, or am I just being jealous?

----------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------

I'm just taking a stab, here, but perhaps he told you he was in a relationship with her, when you first met him, to look as if he had more going on in his past than he really did. Not uncommon! Maybe he wanted to be in one with her, but it wasn't an option. They were more or less friendly toward each other and, now, she just happens to be around. I don't know how you're getting all this information, but maybe he likes you being agitated about it -- makes him feel in control. Yes, it was wrong he didn't tell her he was involved with someone. His motivation might be that he's not fully committed to you in the way you would like. I think he should be more than happy to behave like a man in a relationship if he were a stand-up guy -- oh, and satisfied with the relationship!