Dear Miss Emily:

I'm a 21 year old male. My girlfriend and I recently broke up. According to her because she believes i cant trust her ever since this other guy came into the picture. I told her i needed to know a few things and she said ask away, so i did and got the answer i was looking for, then she completely blew up on me and broke up with me -- afterward telling me to just be friends with her for a while (which i hear is a good sign) so we've been talking everyday -- even after I've done some things to lower my chances, like telling her i got laid...I thought being honest would be the smart thing to do. But here we are, not even a week later, she's dating this other guy. who's 16 and shes 22... so I kinda feel that their relationship might not last. but I'm wondering if its possible she still has feelings for me and if i could get her back, and how could I tell/do that?

------------------------Ask Miss Emily----------------------

It seems with this relationship, anything is possible. I'm guessing, but I think maybe this 16 year-old guy was turning her head, and when you confronted her about it she put herself in the role of playing victim by accusing you of being not trusting her. But hang in there. A fling with a guy this age may be fleeting, and you might once again float to the top. Don't look needy or desperate to have her back, keep your mouth shut about your sexual escapades (you were technically single at the time), because I think you did this to throw water in her face, rather than a devotion to honesty.  But whether that's true or not, if you do get back with her, put down some ground rules to avoid this same scenario from playing out, again. And that means real emotional honesty when the relationship is faltering, and neither gets defensive or creates a web of deception.