Dear Miss Emily,

I've recently started talking to a girl, who I've known for nearly 10 years now.  We just started hanging out more often, and do spend a lot of time together.  We do activities such as long drives to different states, laying on the beach at night together, snuggling while watching a movie, then fall asleep.  We get very close, and hold hands sometimes. We talk everyday, most nights till 1-3 in the morning.  This has been going on for 3 months now. The problem is, she has a boyfriend who lives in another state.  I've confessed that I had feelings for her, but her reply was "Oh I would never cheat on my boyfriend. Sorry." So my question is, is this girl using me? Does she actually like me? What should I do?

-----------------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------------

Yes, I think she has deeper feelings than friendship, but she wants it both ways. She's spending all this time with you, as friends often do, but the holding hands/snuggling, and closeness that comes from it, bespeaks something more than just buds. And because she says one thing, yet does another, it's up to you to decide how you want to conduct yourself. You confessed you have feelings for her, she makes a blanket statement that she would never cheat on her boyfriend (I wonder what he would think of the trips and the cuddling), and it's time to set some boundaries. I know you enjoy your outings with her, and the late night movies and cuddling gives you warm and fuzzy feelings, and hope, but unless she's broken up with her boyfriend, you're giving her the best of both worlds, while you're looking at a broken heart.