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Teen Girl Confused With Definition of Love
- By Miss Emily
- Published 12/8/2011
- Relationships - Teens
Dear Miss Emily:
I'm sorry I have been sending a lot of questions , but your advice is amazing! I even told my friend to come visit this site. It helps to keep your head on straight. Anyway, I'm just writing to ask you something: Do teens really fall in love for real, or it's just a feeling that goes away with time, because true love never fades right ? I'm so confused :/ please help and thank you :)
-------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
Thanks for the compliment! I think love can happen at almost any age. There is, at first, physical attraction. And when you get to know the person, if his (or her) personality is to your liking, it increases your affection for him. But the time it happens in your life is an important factor. If you're young, changes occur during the growing up process. Ideas can change, and maturity brings you into new areas of understanding. Hopefully, during that process, you learn what's best for you, and who is best for you. The longer you spend with him, it either solidifies that love, or it starts to decrease if you find out his habits, interests and values are different than yours, he treats you badly, has insecurities and jealousy, and takes more than he gives. No love prospers if it's out of neediness, rather than wanting it to better your life in a healthy manner. You have to love and respect yourself, in order to respect and cherish love that is given to you. Some relationships have a shelf life. Others grow to form lasting bonds. We can be in love with many people, but often timing is the key to whether it will work for the long haul. As I might have told you, commitment has a lot to do with how ready you are to give love because your life situation, at that moment, may fight it. Any relationship that leads to marriage, for example, should have these key elements: trust, respect, common interests and values, open communication, and a willingness to form a lasting partnership. Love can be a beautiful thing, but it can also tear your heart apart. That is why it's essential to use your brains when you do get involved in a relationship. Be aware of any red flags that tell you, despite the attraction, something isn't right about this person, and I had better protect myself, rather than set myself up for a world of hurt.
I'm sorry I have been sending a lot of questions , but your advice is amazing! I even told my friend to come visit this site. It helps to keep your head on straight. Anyway, I'm just writing to ask you something: Do teens really fall in love for real, or it's just a feeling that goes away with time, because true love never fades right ? I'm so confused :/ please help and thank you :)
-------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
Thanks for the compliment! I think love can happen at almost any age. There is, at first, physical attraction. And when you get to know the person, if his (or her) personality is to your liking, it increases your affection for him. But the time it happens in your life is an important factor. If you're young, changes occur during the growing up process. Ideas can change, and maturity brings you into new areas of understanding. Hopefully, during that process, you learn what's best for you, and who is best for you. The longer you spend with him, it either solidifies that love, or it starts to decrease if you find out his habits, interests and values are different than yours, he treats you badly, has insecurities and jealousy, and takes more than he gives. No love prospers if it's out of neediness, rather than wanting it to better your life in a healthy manner. You have to love and respect yourself, in order to respect and cherish love that is given to you. Some relationships have a shelf life. Others grow to form lasting bonds. We can be in love with many people, but often timing is the key to whether it will work for the long haul. As I might have told you, commitment has a lot to do with how ready you are to give love because your life situation, at that moment, may fight it. Any relationship that leads to marriage, for example, should have these key elements: trust, respect, common interests and values, open communication, and a willingness to form a lasting partnership. Love can be a beautiful thing, but it can also tear your heart apart. That is why it's essential to use your brains when you do get involved in a relationship. Be aware of any red flags that tell you, despite the attraction, something isn't right about this person, and I had better protect myself, rather than set myself up for a world of hurt.
