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Best Friend's Mother Dating After Husband's death?
- By Miss Emily
- Published 11/10/2011
- Relationships - Teens
Dear Miss Emily:
My best friend is 14, and her father passed away this past June from cancer. It was really hard on her, her mother, and 3 brothers (youngest 9). However, just after his passing, her mom got really close to an old friend. We think they're going out, and nobody likes it. Me and my friend hate the fact of how insensitive he could be by trying to be with their mom right after a huge death. Do you think he should be doing this?? What should we do?
---------------------------------Miss Emily's advice--------------------------
Do nothing. You really don't know what's going on with her mother and this friend. Everyone handles grief in his, or her own way, and she may be finding comfort in having someone her age to listen to her, and help support her during this time. After all, he's an old friend. I think he's being respectful of her, but they are enjoying each others company. And, you know, if your friend's father had cancer for a long time, it's possible that his wish was for his wife (your friend's mother) to find someone to fill the void in her life so she won't be lonely. That is quite common, actually. The person who is dying wants to know that (in this case) his wife won't suffer for lack of companionship. Everybody needs somebody, or most of us do, and life is for the living. It's not being disrespectful to her deceased husband's memory, believe me. Your friend's mother hasn't abandon the family, or did not love her husband, she's only trying to make sense of her life after the sad death of her husband by reaching out to someone who is helping ease the pain. If there were to get together, do not judge her. Everyone deserves to be loved and wanted.
---------------------------------Miss Emily's advice--------------------------
Do nothing. You really don't know what's going on with her mother and this friend. Everyone handles grief in his, or her own way, and she may be finding comfort in having someone her age to listen to her, and help support her during this time. After all, he's an old friend. I think he's being respectful of her, but they are enjoying each others company. And, you know, if your friend's father had cancer for a long time, it's possible that his wish was for his wife (your friend's mother) to find someone to fill the void in her life so she won't be lonely. That is quite common, actually. The person who is dying wants to know that (in this case) his wife won't suffer for lack of companionship. Everybody needs somebody, or most of us do, and life is for the living. It's not being disrespectful to her deceased husband's memory, believe me. Your friend's mother hasn't abandon the family, or did not love her husband, she's only trying to make sense of her life after the sad death of her husband by reaching out to someone who is helping ease the pain. If there were to get together, do not judge her. Everyone deserves to be loved and wanted.
