Dear Miss Emily:

My baby's father and I broke up. I still wanna be with him, but he says he never wants to be with me again. I also think he might be talking to another girl. I'm so sad. What should I do ? Everybody says move on but its not that easy.

------------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------------

He seems to be forcing you to move on -- at least for now. I hope in your country he has financial obligations to help support his child -- and if he isn't doing that, you need to seek a remedy through the courts. The best plan for you is to back-off and not push him. If you do, it makes you appear needy, and desperate. It would be best to show him you have the emotional strength to get along without him. If he sees "the new you" and you aren't falling apart, perhaps he will come around. But you can't force someone to behave the way you want, and you won't get it by begging. Take care of your child, and hold your head high. You don't want to be treated like last night's leftovers. If he comes back, you want him to do it on his own free will and where he treats you with respect. People don't respect others who don't show respect for themselves. He's under no obligation to be an active parent to his child, but he should be paying for support. Your problem is not uncommon. This is a consistent theme in many of the letters I receive. Having a baby with a man is never any reassurance that he will stick around. Planning a pregnancy togeher is a far better way to insure some loyalty.