My husband and I have been together for 12 years. I have always helped out with my mother-in-law's parties, holidays, etc. My mother-in-law has 5 sisters, and I have always participated in the birthday parties they give one another. I decorate, make food, and always get them a gift. When my 40th birthday came, not one of them did anything for me. One of the sister's who always gives birthday card to everyone of my kids and husband didn't get me one -- never have. I am always left out. I even make little gifts for my husband's nieces and nephews and never get a thank you. Should I just stop doing for my in-laws and stay away from them? I just can't figure out why they treat me like this.

-----------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------

This group of people are just plain thoughtless. The more you do, the more they expect it; but not for a moment think it would be nice of them to do the same for you. I'm sure it's nothing you've done, only bad breeding on their part -- or some petty resentment they have for you because you're a good person and, deep-down, they know they don't measure up. It appears you could turn yourself inside out for these ingrates and they would be upset you made a mess. Although giving should be done without feeling the need for reciprocation, these ladies don't deserve the attention and help you are giving them. Rudeness should never be rewarded. Start to wean yourself from helping out to the degree that you do. Volunteering your time to the needy would be a better choice than helping people who wouldn't know the definition of the word gratitude if it slapped them up one side of the head.