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Teenager Wants To Leave Home
- By Miss Emily
- Published 08/15/2011
- Relationships - Teens
Hey miss Emily,
I am 17 years old and I have a lot of problems with my mom. We constantly fight and she always blames me for us fighting, no matter what it is about. I get this feeling, whenever my mom gets involved with someone, that she changes towards me and does whatever her husband wants. I have started dating this guy and I really like him -- but because my stepdad hates his family, my mom doesn't want me around him. And the thing is, before my mom got married, I would be by this guys aunt's house until late but, now, all of a sudden, i'ts bad. I understand my stepdad wants to be a father figure, but I never needed a dad before. Why would I need one now? He is taking my freedom away to please his ego. I am thinking about getting a flat and living on my own before my mom throws me out like she said she would. Please help! I am starting to believe I make my mom miserable.
----------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------
Parents can be all too human, and that can make a child's life unplesant, at times. I wouldn't abandon your home, however, unless you are absolutely sure you can carry it off on your own. Seventeen is awfully young to be setting up a household. It takes a job and money to pay the bills. I am sure you care a great deal for this guy, but it can't be at the exclusion of all else. I know you're angry, and you think you are odd-person-out at your home, but you also need to think about your creature comforts. A better goal, because you seem smart, is to get an education, and go for a career. That is when you can lead your own life, with apologies to none! Right now, be reflective and not hasty. A plan is what you need. I know you didn't have a dad in the past, and you resent your mother's choice of a mate and him dictating your life (and I agree with you) but, again, at 17, there's no sense in cutting off your nose to spite your face. A plan. One that takes you where you want to be with a good job, and the freedom to be your own boss. Don't look to a guy to do that for you. Chances are, you'll end up having him dictate your life for you, and you'll be no better off than you are now. You don't know how long this relationship will last with him. Right now, play it cool. Try to avoid arguing with your mom, or step-dad. Pick your battles, wisely. You know how your mother is going to react before you even start talking to her. A smart person learns to stay in the background, while creating goals that are reasonable, workable, and sensible. I wish you the best in your quest.
I am 17 years old and I have a lot of problems with my mom. We constantly fight and she always blames me for us fighting, no matter what it is about. I get this feeling, whenever my mom gets involved with someone, that she changes towards me and does whatever her husband wants. I have started dating this guy and I really like him -- but because my stepdad hates his family, my mom doesn't want me around him. And the thing is, before my mom got married, I would be by this guys aunt's house until late but, now, all of a sudden, i'ts bad. I understand my stepdad wants to be a father figure, but I never needed a dad before. Why would I need one now? He is taking my freedom away to please his ego. I am thinking about getting a flat and living on my own before my mom throws me out like she said she would. Please help! I am starting to believe I make my mom miserable.
----------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------
Parents can be all too human, and that can make a child's life unplesant, at times. I wouldn't abandon your home, however, unless you are absolutely sure you can carry it off on your own. Seventeen is awfully young to be setting up a household. It takes a job and money to pay the bills. I am sure you care a great deal for this guy, but it can't be at the exclusion of all else. I know you're angry, and you think you are odd-person-out at your home, but you also need to think about your creature comforts. A better goal, because you seem smart, is to get an education, and go for a career. That is when you can lead your own life, with apologies to none! Right now, be reflective and not hasty. A plan is what you need. I know you didn't have a dad in the past, and you resent your mother's choice of a mate and him dictating your life (and I agree with you) but, again, at 17, there's no sense in cutting off your nose to spite your face. A plan. One that takes you where you want to be with a good job, and the freedom to be your own boss. Don't look to a guy to do that for you. Chances are, you'll end up having him dictate your life for you, and you'll be no better off than you are now. You don't know how long this relationship will last with him. Right now, play it cool. Try to avoid arguing with your mom, or step-dad. Pick your battles, wisely. You know how your mother is going to react before you even start talking to her. A smart person learns to stay in the background, while creating goals that are reasonable, workable, and sensible. I wish you the best in your quest.
