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Baby Dilemma
- By Miss Emily
- Published 03/18/2011
- Relationships - Women
Dear Miss Emily:
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months now. I have 2 kids from a previous marriage and when i gave birth to my last child the doctor told me he wasn't sure if i could have more. I've talked to my boyfriend about it cause he wants a child. i told him that I'm unsure if i can have anymore, and he said that he would like one of his own -- but if i couldn't, then, I couldn't. The subject came back up and I told him that I'm gonna have a test done to tell me if my tubes are blocked ,or not, and if I have more options. He said he's not going anywhere, but I want to be able to give him a child later on down the road. I don't know. If I can't, I am afraid he will leave.
------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------
I understand your concern. Many a man has said he can deal with it if he can't have children, only to change his mind down the line. But there's only so much you can do. Some doctors have been wrong on this subject. Get the tests and take it from that point. There are options, such as artificial insemination and surrogacy to name a few. Keep the lines of communication open. You've been with him only 8 months, and if you were to break up, down the line, it could have nothing to do with whether you can have a child with him. I'm not trying to a messenger of doom -- only to take the urgency out of your thinking on this matter. If you do everything you can to have a child with him, and it doesn't come to fruition, you'll deal with it then. To second guess what the future may, or may not hold, now, will be counterproductive to the relationship. Get all the medical information you can before jumping to conclusions.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months now. I have 2 kids from a previous marriage and when i gave birth to my last child the doctor told me he wasn't sure if i could have more. I've talked to my boyfriend about it cause he wants a child. i told him that I'm unsure if i can have anymore, and he said that he would like one of his own -- but if i couldn't, then, I couldn't. The subject came back up and I told him that I'm gonna have a test done to tell me if my tubes are blocked ,or not, and if I have more options. He said he's not going anywhere, but I want to be able to give him a child later on down the road. I don't know. If I can't, I am afraid he will leave.
------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------
I understand your concern. Many a man has said he can deal with it if he can't have children, only to change his mind down the line. But there's only so much you can do. Some doctors have been wrong on this subject. Get the tests and take it from that point. There are options, such as artificial insemination and surrogacy to name a few. Keep the lines of communication open. You've been with him only 8 months, and if you were to break up, down the line, it could have nothing to do with whether you can have a child with him. I'm not trying to a messenger of doom -- only to take the urgency out of your thinking on this matter. If you do everything you can to have a child with him, and it doesn't come to fruition, you'll deal with it then. To second guess what the future may, or may not hold, now, will be counterproductive to the relationship. Get all the medical information you can before jumping to conclusions.
