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Listening Is A Good Thing
- By Miss Emily
- Published 02/3/2011
- Relationships - Teens
Hi Emily,
So I'm 15 and there's this guy I really like. He likes me too but he says he doesn't want a relationship right now. His best friend told me that it's because he's having a lot of family problems but, I think, if he gave me the chance, I could help him cope with all the stuff he's going through. I really want to go after him and try and help him but I don't know if that's the right thing to do. Should I try and help or just back off for now? Please help me!
------------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
Have the smarts to back off, and believe what he, and his friend told you. He has his reasons for not getting involved, and that should be respected -- assuming he's being totally honest with you. You don't want to put yourself in the role of counselor in what's going on with him. That isn't a good start in a relationship. I'm not being callous, here, and I am sure a caring ear could be warranted in a friendship situation -- but in a budding romance, it could only cause early friction, or problems that neither of you need. He simply does not want the responsibility of a relationship. Again, the mature approach for you is to listen -- and respond appropriately.
So I'm 15 and there's this guy I really like. He likes me too but he says he doesn't want a relationship right now. His best friend told me that it's because he's having a lot of family problems but, I think, if he gave me the chance, I could help him cope with all the stuff he's going through. I really want to go after him and try and help him but I don't know if that's the right thing to do. Should I try and help or just back off for now? Please help me!
------------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------
Have the smarts to back off, and believe what he, and his friend told you. He has his reasons for not getting involved, and that should be respected -- assuming he's being totally honest with you. You don't want to put yourself in the role of counselor in what's going on with him. That isn't a good start in a relationship. I'm not being callous, here, and I am sure a caring ear could be warranted in a friendship situation -- but in a budding romance, it could only cause early friction, or problems that neither of you need. He simply does not want the responsibility of a relationship. Again, the mature approach for you is to listen -- and respond appropriately.
