Dear Emily,

I'm an 18 year-old female and in college. During the summer I had a think with this guy named "Jim" and it was a pretty hot and cold thing to start out with. Like he would like me for a few days and whenever I put myself out there, he would change his mind and say that he wanted to just be friends. It went on like this for about a month, but we ended up being a thing . . .until we went to a party and got into this huge fight. One of my friends told me some nasty stuff that he said behind my back. I am not completely sure it was true, or not but we got into a huge fight and then didn't talk or see each other up until a few weeks ago. He has been strangely nice to me but the problem is, I can't talk to him. I get so nervous and I feel like everything I say is going to sound extremely stupid. I like him though, again. And I don't know what to do, how to act, and if it's worth trying again?

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice--------------------------

Perhaps it's time to let this relationship go. The fact that you truly don't trust him, and the feeling that you are being judged is what makes you tongue-tied and insecure. If you do feel inadequate in some ways, based on other personal issues, this relationship with him magnifies it. Find relationships that complement your attributes and don't test, or degrade your sense of self. To be able to follow though on this relationship, you'd have to know that he really likes the person you are, understands your true nature and treats you with respect. Right now, I don't think that's the case.