I met this girl 40 days ago. It has been the standard hot n heavy in the first month and now has died off down to seeing her 2 times a week, at most, in lieu of 4 to 5. After our first date, she told me her fiance passed away only 9 months ago.  She was madly in love with him and he died on duty. Also note they had a baby together, and at the time of his death the daughter was only 4 months.  Obviously, this is very very devastating to her. I support what she is going through, and obviously daddy will always be a strong part of their life pictures, family etc.  Her daughter is great, and I have met her on several occasions. Since she is a single mother we usually just hang out at her house. I am 35 and she is 32.  I have pretty strong feelings for her for such a short time. We now communicate, maybe, every other day. Some days I get the major cold shoulder where I feel she wants space, then out of the blue I might get a message saying "I wish you where here lying next to me.  I now she is on depression medicine since the traumatic event.  I feel like I should just run out of this one while I am ahead, but I really do care for her a ton.
She has lots of friends, and it is relevant daily calls, visitors etc., she gets because everyone wants to make sure she is all right. Her brothers are both police officers, and I have been" a secret" to her family -- but I have met a few of her friends. Side note, she was in bed last week, I was in living room, and her phone text messages went off. She asked if I could tell her who it was. I said doctor.  She said, ok, no biggie.  But Doctor is this Doctor from out of state she met, and they talk nightly.
The text message said I miss you and I'm falling n love with you. This was from the DR. I believe she did not think I saw it, even though she asked me to see who it was from.  How tough is this one? 

----------------------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------------------


Real tough. And it would take some steely emotions to weather what may be ahead if you are falling in love with her. I think she's filling the void in her life, any way she can. That is not an insult to her, or you, in the least. She's been through hell. She may simply be unaware of some of the heartache it could cause. At this point in her life, she's eager to fill the emptiness with emotional strokes  --  but when she wants them. She has, however, made no promises - -and if she did, I would question her judgment. That call from the doctor was a good thing for you to see. That type of warning only solidifies your reason to tread lightly in this relationship. Limit your time with her until you have more secure footing in this relationship -- if that is even possible. And I would certainly be forthcoming about it. To fall for her, and her child, this soon after her husband's death, is not in your best interest.