Dear Miss Emily:

My bf and i have a child 2gether. He gave me some money for our child then asked for it back. He has been physically and emotionally abusive. He lies and cons people to get them to do things for them. He blames me for him dropping out of his classes. Every time i say I'm done, he has some sob story to make me come back. I know its over, but he wont move cus he has no place to go. What are my options? And am i misleading him by hooking up with him?

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------

You're doing damage to yourself if you continue to hook up with him. That's what would concern me. You don't have any obligations to a man who has physically and emotionally abused you; although your concerns are not uncommon for women in these types of relationships. I think you need to be is a safe place that will be the best for your child. This man is self-centered and a troubled human being (an understatement) who also has a manipulative side that allows him to get his way -- and now he has appealed to you to feel sorry for him. Your only concern, and options should center on protecting you and your child. Beyond that, I see no room for this man in your life -- other than his exercising visitation rights -- unless you instigate a court order preventing it. Abusive relationships are usually cyclical. Please don't let this happen to you -- although I know you said it's over. He does not love you. He simply doesn't know what the word means. He has, however, developed a need to control you for his purposes. The sooner you realize it, the better off you'll be.