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Fiance Watching His Back
- By Miss Emily
- Published 11/1/2010
- Relationships - Women
Hi Emily:
My fiance and I have been together for almost a year now and have a great relationship. At the beginning though, his ex wife made things very difficult for us because she was stuck on getting him back. What made things even more difficult though, was his brothers wife who teamed up with his ex wife to slander me on facebook and spread awful rumors about me. I live in Latin America and when someone spreads a rumor about you here, everybody finds out. Things became so bad that I had to return to the United States for three months to let things cool off before going back and getting my life on track again. The facebook drama continued but only on my fiances sister in laws side. His ex wife is no longer a problem but every time that I see his sister in law, I want to kill her. She is very difficult and his brother is very protective of her even though she has done similar things to my fiance's ENTIRE family. I just HATE her and can't forgive her. But now it seems like everyone wants to be a happy family, again, and wants to just ignore her but I cant and it is causing A LOT of fighting between me and my fiance. Now I am the bad one, because I don't want to spend time with my fiance and his brother and the monster woman -- but she hurt me deeply and this is all too soon. I had to move to a different country because of the things that she did. what should i do??? PLEASE help me. Is this going to be a deal breaker?????
---------------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------------
I think what you have explained is a deal breaker. Love your fiance as you may, if he wants everything to be fine, now (despite the horrible character assassination of you by his ex, and the constant attacks from his sister-in-law), you won't be truly happy. You would have to forgive this woman and be able to move on -- and you'd also have to agree that your fiance is right in his approach. As of now, that isn't the case, and I think you'll have to make the hard choice to break up with a man who was not willing to put your needs first, but would rather "kiss ass" for the sake of family unity. A profuse apology from his sister-in-law would be warranted, but it doesn't seem forthcoming, you probably wouldn't accept it, anyway, and feeling alienated is not my idea of a good time.
My fiance and I have been together for almost a year now and have a great relationship. At the beginning though, his ex wife made things very difficult for us because she was stuck on getting him back. What made things even more difficult though, was his brothers wife who teamed up with his ex wife to slander me on facebook and spread awful rumors about me. I live in Latin America and when someone spreads a rumor about you here, everybody finds out. Things became so bad that I had to return to the United States for three months to let things cool off before going back and getting my life on track again. The facebook drama continued but only on my fiances sister in laws side. His ex wife is no longer a problem but every time that I see his sister in law, I want to kill her. She is very difficult and his brother is very protective of her even though she has done similar things to my fiance's ENTIRE family. I just HATE her and can't forgive her. But now it seems like everyone wants to be a happy family, again, and wants to just ignore her but I cant and it is causing A LOT of fighting between me and my fiance. Now I am the bad one, because I don't want to spend time with my fiance and his brother and the monster woman -- but she hurt me deeply and this is all too soon. I had to move to a different country because of the things that she did. what should i do??? PLEASE help me. Is this going to be a deal breaker?????
---------------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------------
I think what you have explained is a deal breaker. Love your fiance as you may, if he wants everything to be fine, now (despite the horrible character assassination of you by his ex, and the constant attacks from his sister-in-law), you won't be truly happy. You would have to forgive this woman and be able to move on -- and you'd also have to agree that your fiance is right in his approach. As of now, that isn't the case, and I think you'll have to make the hard choice to break up with a man who was not willing to put your needs first, but would rather "kiss ass" for the sake of family unity. A profuse apology from his sister-in-law would be warranted, but it doesn't seem forthcoming, you probably wouldn't accept it, anyway, and feeling alienated is not my idea of a good time.
