Dear Miss Emily:

I dated a guy for a few months and it got really serious pretty fast.  We were talking about long-term future, and he was really into the relationship. We met with a problem when I found out that he was helping a friend with a drug problem by lending him money.  I somewhat broke it off -- but decided to take him back after he finally explained himself.  Within that week, he said that he's not ready for a relationship yet because he is not where he wants to be in his career yet (he's an engineer). He also said that he will have a better idea in November when he might leave his current job and wants to keep talking with me because he sees us being together.  That was 5 months ago, and we talk every week on the phone and have attended 2 weddings together since then.  He has also invited me on a weekend trip with his family (whom I did not even meet while we were dating). We are intimate when see each other but there is no real talk of getting back together anytime soon.  I am still in love with him, and I don't know if I need to let it go because there has been no change since the breakup. What do you think?  Is this guy stringing me along or is he genuinely wanting to be with me but wants to get his life together first?

---------------------------Miss Emily's advice-------------------------

I tend to agree with what I'm sure you are already thinking -- this is all very "iffy." I don't know whether you would term what he's doing as stringing you along -- that infers to me he has no intention of having any future with you, and I think he's simply confused about what he wants. It's September, and I'd wait for the big November decision. If may not come, but at least then you can tell him, "November is here, and now is the time to let me know what you want. And if you don't know what you want, then this is what I want . ??? "  You fill in the question mark, because, I trust, even if he doesn't know what he wants, at least you will.